33 days out

I have not written in nearly two weeks.  I have half finished posts in my “drafts” folder, but somehow, I haven’t seemed to find time to complete them. 

 

The past 10 days have been a whirlwind of activity.  Wedding projects are being completed; we went through a major software update at work, so that was moderately stressful.  There’s a new position opening at work, a permanent position, and my chances are about 50/50.  I’m not sure I want the job.  It’s highly stressful, with absolutely no downtime.  The others in the same job regularly skip lunches and breaks to complete half of their workload.  I’m not sure that I could successfully work in that job.

 

I also have cold feet.  I have it really bad.  The kind where you start dreaming about your ex’s, where you have panic attacks while trying on your veil, where even thinking about the vows give you hot flashes.  I never thought I would be the person to get cold feet.  I thought I would be nonchalant and casual.  But it’s the standinguptherebeforehundredsofpeopleandohmygoodnesswhatiftheyHATEit??? 

 

I seriously cannot wait until this ends.